Why did the chicken cross the road?

• Plato: For the greater good.
• Douglas Adams: Forty-two.
• Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
• Aristotle: To actualize its potential.
• Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
• Salvador Dali: The Fish.
• Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
• Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.
• Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.
• Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
• The Sphinx: You tell me.
• Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
• Supreme Soviet: There has never been a chicken in this photograph.
• Tolkien: Chickens are respectable folk, and well thought of. They never go on any adventures or do anything unexpected. One fine spring day, as the chicken wandered contentedly around the farmyard, clucking and pecking and enjoying herself immensely, there appeared a Wizard and thirteen Dwarves who were in need of a chicken to share in their adventure. Reluctantly she joined their party, and with them crossed the road into the great Unknown, muttering about how rude the Dwarves were to take her away on such short notice, without even giving her time to brush her feathers or fetch her hat.